So, it’s October. I last posted in Feb-broohaha. Let’s just leave it at that.
A summer happened, some stuff went down, we’re all still alive, there’s a half-finished bottle of red on the kitchen counter, a studio upstairs with supplies in it, an amazing husband working off to my right, right now, and coffee money in my wallet (I think.)
So things are… pretty good, I think. Considering that Thanksgiving was yesterday, I’m still feeling thankful for the little things that have kept it all together…it’s always the little things.
I’m not going to lie – I basically have nothing else to say of any value other than ‘I’m still here.’ Yup, that’s what I’m breaking my 7 month silence to announce. So much change is afoot, which is pretty common for this season, and I feel like inhaling it, eating it, bathing in it, screaming at it, wearing it, punching it and shouting it. Very little about change is actually comfortable or really even appealing when it’s going down, but it’s like that cold, autumn breeze – it’s cold, and it speaks of goddamn colder, but still, it feels good to inhale.
Can you tell I’m spending a lot of time inside my head? To say I’ve been doing some soul-searching is an understatement. All my shit is SO right up in front of me, most of it concerning my beloved Antoinette Design, and some not-so-beloved beliefs that are choking me. I’m not gonna get into writing about it…I don’t want to be here all night writing and crying and drinking, but if you were here with me right now I’d be able to express all of this in-my-face shit with bell-like clarity through a stunning choreography of dance moves, gibberish and jazz-hands. I’ll let you know when tickets are on sale…
You know, dear readers, that I will elaborate on all this in-my-face-shit *eventually*, but until then, here are some pretty places that I’ve visited this summer, thankfully outside of my head…

Tobermory - May 2011

We went to the beach. It was sandy. There was candy.

I remembered that I could make prettiness with weeds

I fell in love with Montreal. Again.

And again.

And again.

My heart grew 4 sizes this night...

We found wild right around the corner

WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!

This is not a blog post. It’s a random collection of debris from the January that was. Is anyone else feeling deeply disturbed that it is already February? Or am I feeling disturbed enough for all of us?

This is how the month started...with a madman (my father) ringing in the new year with the annual bottling of horseradish. The fumes were redolent of tear gas and love.

Due to the new year’s double bitch-slap of cold and post-holiday poverty, we’ve been eating a lot of pho to keep warm. It costs just $8 for a bathtub full of awesomeness. Near our most favorite pho restaurant, there is a Sherwin Williams store whose logo caught our eye one night…Sherwin Williams and I go way back, as my last job involved my having to understand their paint tinting systems, so I was familiar with most of the branding – BUT NOT THIS. Good god, who the hell approved this logo for public release!?

There are no words...

So yes, the weather’s been cold, ’cause, you know, it was JANUARY, so when we haven’t been lighting our inner fires with Richard’s Excellent Horseradish, we have been huddling together for warmth.

Rama and Mr. Rooth

Here’s further proof that January was here:

I’m not gonna lie. I suck at this blog upkeep thing. It’s fine, I’m cool with it. I’ve owned it. It’s my reality. I’m conscious of this manifestation…insert all other platitudes that will absolve me of my concern here.

2010 was…was? It’s over? WTF? Obviously I’ve been really *aware* lately…I haven’t been able to come up with random things to talk about here, I’ve all but dropped out of the Twitter and FB scenes and I’ve barely made anything in months. Except for a new home. At least I have that to show for all of my recent hermitty-ness.

I don’t want to get into rehashing the move, or ‘the year in review’ or my plans for 2011 or how much things are great/annoying/exciting/exhausting, so I’ve decided that this first post of the new year will consist of nothing more than a list, some pix and maybe a few captions. Besides, I’ve got to get to bed sooner than later.

I got a very nice invitation in my inbox today, from my spectacular Mom.
And, holy shit did it bring up a lot stuff in my brain today, as communication with my Mom sometimes(often) does. And this was just an e-vite…that’s it.
But it was an e-vite to a home jewelry party, for a company that sounds like it was named after a steamy, Latin dance step, that specializes in ‘hand-crafted’ sterling silver jewelry. Low growl. Groan. Facepalm.
To be honest, and that’s all I’m being here, while I totally want to hang out with my Mom, and would do so at a ghastly home sales party if it was the only opportunity to see her (awww…) I really wouldn’t attend a home jewelry party like this because of a few reasons. First, my ego. I’d totally look at everything thinking “I could prolly make that” even if I couldn’t. I’m kind of irritating that way. Secondly, my doubt.

Yeah, I know. That’s the last time I posted…

At this point I’m just going to be honest and say “I have no frikken idea what to post about.” I have blog-block. I have pseudo-performance anxiety. I have had next to no spare time, my life has served me a series of hugs and bitch-slaps, I have a deep need to stay the f**k away from my computer on weekends, I have too many excuses…

Screw it…the best thing for me to do is to repress the rising feeling of blog-barf itching in my fingertips, ignore the assumed need to write about every last thing that has happened to me in that last 6 months and instead focus on something succinct, creative, concrete…and a bit geeky-exciting…well, for me…

Hello blog. I’ve missed you.

I have decided that instead of rehashing the trials of the past 2.5 months, it’s just best to look forward to the awesomeness that is now and to come. In short, here’s what has happened: a death, a breakdown, a resignation, a new job, reconnections, a rest, a holiday, a new commitment, and January.

See? That was easy!

(oh wow, I wish the 2 and a half months could’ve been, seriously…)

I have a new job, which is awesome. I am beyond thankful. Antoinette Design has taken a back-seat to the rest of my life for the past while, and while I miss it enormously, I’m sure at some point I will note that the break was a good thing. I have been working on a lot of designs and directions in my brain while I push a mouse all day…and I read a lot of blogs on my lunch break, which really inspire me.

Hi! I'm Erika! I'm tired! Buy my stuff!

(Due to a lack of wireless connectivity at the White Oaks High School Craftapalooza show earlier today, I decided to ‘tweet’ my first holiday show experience of 2009 into my notepad app on my iPod. Allow me the luxury of offering a little context for you: I am completely exhausted, went to bed at 2:30 this morning and was up just before 7, was missing bits of inventory that I wanted to have completed for the show, have had 3 unbelievably stressful weeks in a row with no ‘breaks’, no luck, and very little money. I am, in short, very close to unhinged…so because I am a sucker for punishment, I put on my bravest face and decided to peddle my pretties to the world today.)

Oh…this made me happy tonight. Right after I finished posting my War and Peace-sized post below, I got an Etsy convo from my lovely SATeam-mate  Caron (of Beadsire) telling me that she had chosen one of my necklaces as part of her awesome, inspiring and oh-so-fresh Etsy Treasury titled “4th Chakra Anahata – The heart chakra – air, social identity, oriented to self-acceptance.” Click here to see it (this link will be active until Oct. 26 or so, I think Treasuries are active for 48 hours.)

How cool! What a great theme for a Treasury! Be sure to check it out, this is one of the most creative Treasuries that I’ve seen, I love absolutely everything in it!

Thanks Caron!

The top 2 rows of the 4th Chakra Treasury by Caron...a beautiful collection

The bottom two rows...I looooooooooove the yoga image so much...

Having grown up in a bilingual area of Québec (as an anglo) I have been a relatively decent french-speaker since I was about 10 or so; meaning that I could get along well enough to translate for my parents who barely spoke french. Once I hit high school, I was in the immersion program and discovered that really, I didn’t have a whole lot of support available to me in terms of homework help because of my anglo family, so I just futzed my way through with the help of my friends, and actually managed to graduate with a provincial bilingual designation at the end of it all. I lived for a month and a half in Brittany, France with a french-speaking family, and then in the heart of Paris, and thrived happily in french. I now work as a bilingual customer service rep, and answer technical questions and prepare quasi-legal documents in french…and…am generally less terrified about doing all of that than I was 6 months ago. What is truly amazing, however, is that despite all of these efforts and experiences over the speaking-years of my life, I don’t think I ever, ever knew how to say ‘Thanksgiving’ in french…

Good morning, Erika speaking...

Ridiculous, I know. Everyone loves blogs. They have become so common-place that it’s probably not even cool to actually say that out loud. But honestly, I love them. They remind me about that I still (generally) like humanity. And, they have kind of saved my life these past few days. Because I answer phones to pay the rent (until my darling Antoinette starts bringing home the bacon! One must have goals!) the internet, specifically a few glorious, wonderful, warm and wooly blogs help keep my sanity in check on those days when the general public has convinced me that the sky is indeed falling…and that it’s somehow my fault. These blogs are my lunch-time dates when I can’t bring myself to go to (or fight my way to) the gym, they are the musings that I munch my cereal to in the morning, and are sometimes the last words that I read before falling into bed.